Why People Arrive at Work So Differently

David Smithson-Rudd examines how education, early experience and life circumstances shape workplace behaviour, and the leadership challenge this creates.

Introduction

Most of us enter the workplace carrying assumptions about how it operates, how success is achieved, and how people behave at work. Those assumptions rarely come from experience. They come from education, culture, and the stories we are told growing up.

For many, the first few years of work are not just about learning a role, but about unlearning expectations that no longer hold up. This is where frustration, disengagement, and poor leadership decisions often begin.

People do not arrive at work equally prepared for its realities. Understanding why and responding well is now one of the most important responsibilities of modern leadership.

We’re Taught Subjects, Not How Work Actually Works

Much is made of the role of education in shaping who we become at work, but there is a significant gap in what we are taught. Schools focus on knowledge, compliance, and, if we are fortunate, aspiration. What they rarely teach is how to operate in environments defined by ambiguity, hierarchy, and competing interests.

Attempts are made to develop collaboration through group projects and team sports, but these often rely on narrow models that suit some personalities and learning styles far better than others. Meanwhile, success is framed as linear and merit-based. Anyone with real workplace experience quickly learns that progression is rarely straightforward and is often influenced by factors beyond effort or ability.

The result is that many people leave education with expectations that do not match the reality of working life.

The First Reality Check: Entering the World of Work

Exposure to the reality of work often comes suddenly. For some, this happens gradually through part-time jobs in their teenage years. For others, it arrives all at once in their first full-time role.

Early work introduces hierarchy, accountability, customer pressure, and process. It teaches lessons that cannot be learned in a classroom. I remember working in a village shop at fifteen and assuming that notifying my boss of a friend’s birthday party was enough to secure the day off. I quickly learned that time off required planning, approval, and cover. I did get the day off, but more importantly, I learned how responsibility actually works.

Those who work young often learn “how to be” in the workplace before they start thinking about progression. This does not guarantee greater competence, but it does tend to make people more prepared for the realities they will face later.

Work Is Human Before It Is Logical

Once in the workplace, it becomes clear that performance is shaped as much by emotion as by skill. Confidence, fear, trust, belonging, and insecurity all influence how people show up and how they work with others.

Photo by Desola Lanre-Ologun on Unsplash

For those who move into leadership, this complexity intensifies. Leaders are not only responsible for their own performance, but for navigating the emotional and practical realities of others. The way they behave sets the tone for entire teams. When challenges arise at senior levels, the ripple effects can be felt across an organisation.

Technical competence is essential, but it is never sufficient on its own, especially when managing people.

Where the Learning Curve Is Cushioned

Not everyone starts their working life under the same conditions. In a country with high levels of inequality, financial and social safety nets play a significant role in shaping how people experience work.

Having a safety net is clearly beneficial. It reduces the immediate risk of hardship and offers protection when things go wrong. However, it also changes how risk, urgency, and consequences are perceived.

For those without a safety net, income is directly tied to housing, stability, and quality of life. This creates a powerful incentive to adapt, learn, and progress. The pressure can be intense, but it often accelerates development and focus, particularly when dependants or long-term goals are involved.

Those with a safety net tend to experience a different learning curve. Development is driven more by choice than necessity. Risks feel more manageable because the consequences are less severe. While many still develop strong discipline and ambition, the psychological pressure to adapt quickly is often lower.

Neither path is more moral than the other. Both are real. What they do is shape how, when, and why people learn who they are at work.

The Leadership Responsibility: Meet People Where They Are

Every employee arrives with a different set of assumptions, coping mechanisms, and experiences. Effective leadership starts by acknowledging this reality.

Fair leadership is not uniform leadership. Treating everyone exactly the same ignores the fact that people need different levels of support, challenge, and structure to thrive. Development requires diagnosis, not judgement.

Strong leaders focus less on why someone is the way they are, and more on what they need to succeed now. Context matters, but progress matters more.

Development Is a Journey, Not a Deficit

No one ever finishes learning how to work. Even decades into a career, people are still refining how they lead, collaborate, and respond to pressure.

The role of leadership is not to correct perceived shortcomings, but to accelerate learning without shame. Organisations that understand this build stronger teams, make better decisions, and retain good people for longer.

Businesses succeed when leaders recognise that development is not about fixing people, but about creating the conditions in which they can grow.

For Founders and Managing Directors

If you are leading people and finding that performance, engagement, or progression feels inconsistent, the issue may not be capability. It may be misalignment between expectation and experience.

At Consult DSR, I work with leaders to understand where their teams are starting from and how to support development in a way that is practical, fair, and effective.

Book a free 30-minute call if you want to know more.

Better leadership begins with understanding the journey people are actually on.